I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
are you so shy because you have an std?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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