Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
