So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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