Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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