Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
