I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
