It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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