Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
We are two peas in an std pod
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Randomize