my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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