Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
How does it feel to date your dad?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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