She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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