so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
