I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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