A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
