so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
