when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
