Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
