yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
