you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Of course I have a pirate flag
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
