I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bartender felt bad for me
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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