I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
