it's too hot outside to masturbate.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
