I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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