Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
