Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Randomize