Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
