My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
