i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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