plz talk dirty to me
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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