i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
