you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
