I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize