I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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