I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Blood and glitter go together right?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
