come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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