There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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