turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
