either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
