Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
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