i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Floor bacon is actually really good
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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