You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
You were trust falling into bushes
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
