would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
