Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
The air was thick with penises
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
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