There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
