nut hugger
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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