the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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