you mean i was at the winter classic?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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