thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
