you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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