we made out on top of his cat.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
